Personal freedom starts with a decision and every decision has two choices, to choose fear or to choose growth. Growth and fear cannot inhabit the same space. Stay imprisoned by choosing fear and growth becomes unavailable. Experience possibility by choosing growth and leave fear behind.
Sounds easy, and it is, so why is it so hard to say yes to growth, to expansion, to possibility? In the words of Kyle Cease, “the mind can measure what it can lose but it can’t measure what it can gain.” The mind is afraid of what it doesn’t know or hasn’t experienced before. So how do you start choosing growth over fear? Simple, with love. Fear lives in the mind and uses past experiences to gauge future outcomes. Growth is measured in the heart and requires new experiences to expand and shift one’s consciousness.
Three years ago, I chose growth and in so doing, received my certification in transformational life coaching and hypnotherapy.
Prior to saying yes to myself, I had spent the last 15 years of my career in the corporate world after completing my Master of Science degree in Library and Information Science and for most of that time, I fantasized about doing something else and being someone else. I was trapped in fear and a revolving door of financial stress. That fear and self-sabotage was born out of the unconscious wounds I still carried from childhood.
I am a survivor of childhood sexual, physical and emotional abuse. In adulthood, the effects of my childhood abuse played out in love and sex addiction and intimacy avoidance. I was a serial monogamist, desperately seeking The One who could take away my misery and bestow me with self-worth but I only succeeded in leaving behind a trail of broken hearts on both sides.
As a recovered love and sex addict and intimacy avoidant, I understand how trauma can deeply affect one’s emotional health and ability to live a full, happy and enriching life.
Once I became ready to acknowledge that I was the common denominator in my dysfunctional life and realized that change had to come from within, I gained a deeper understanding of how my past conditioning and traumas created the unconscious rules I was living by; rules I unwittingly allowed to control my life and relationships.
I discovered hypnotherapy and it had a tremendous impact on my personal healing and soon after I bit the personal development bug. I absorbed books on healing trauma, love addiction and living consciously. Once I became aware of the unconscious rules I was living by, I adopted tools to help me regain control over my emotional state and began making better-informed choices about how I live and love.
Climbing out of my deep, dark hole of despair took courage and support. It required courage and support to look at those inner hurts to find the fuel to transform those hurts into power, into self-awareness, into intention, into confidence, into trust, into self-love, into happiness, into joy and peace. I no longer make choices based on self-constructed subconscious fears and instead use self-awareness to deconstruct self-destructive patterns and behaviors.
The journey continues and I am now passionate about helping others uncover the unconscious rules controlling the destiny of their lives and create conscious, enriching lives and relationships.
If my story resonates with you and you want to learn how to create meaning in your life and relationships, untethered by the emotional baggage of the past, then I want to invite you into a deeper conversation with me.